We have finally found Obama’s weakness, folks: things he can’t control. Because despite gas prices being determined by outside factors like supply levels, speculation, summer demand and uncertainty in the Middle East, it feels like the President should be able to lower oil prices just by doing this: (Quoting Donald Trump: “Saudi Arabia said, ‘Uh, let’s raise the price; let’s cut back production… They wanna go in and raise the price of oil because we have nobody in Washington that sits back and says, ‘You’re not gonna raise that fuckin’ price, you understand me?”) Thank you, golden-helmeted noise warrior! I know whenever I yell at a waiter to get my steak right or I’ll punch him in the face, it always comes back delicious, and certainly more moist!
STEPHEN COLBERT, The Colbert Report (via inothernews)

mcflynnthm:

kitchenknivesandcherrybombs:

allyouzombies:

stfufauxminists:

mohandasgandhi:

devendras-mistress:

zainyk:

brooklynmutt:

Obama’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner speech - WaPo

WATCH IT.

SWAG

I’m dead.  It’s nice having a president who’s intentionally funny unlike the last guy….

Well done, sir.

Ok I couldn’t get the whole thing to load but just The Lion king part alone is worth a reblog I lollerskated so hard.

Totally saw the Lion King part coming, but that didn’t make it any less funny.

This man is my president.

Watching the look on Trump’s face brought this video to a new level.

Holy crap! This is just too good :D

Nope. Zero,” the president said to the speaker. Mr. Boehner tried again. “Nope. Zero,” Mr. Obama repeated. “John, this is it.” A long silence followed, said one participant in the meeting. “It was just like an awkward, ‘O.K., well, what do you do now?’